George John DeAntonio in 1957
1940 - 2006

First of all I want to thank everyone for coming to the service. He would have been so happy to see everyone.

Our family is still grieving over the loss of his dear sister, Patty, in addition to this newest lost. It is very difficult situation as you can well imagine. So, bear with us all.

He loved his sister Patty very much and when she died so unexpected…. He was crushed.  He cried so much that his chest muscles were sore.  If she had not died, I believe that he would have been able to stay with us awhile longer,  The stress of the wake and funeral gave him a major setback.

It is difficult to know where to begin to tell you just what this man has meant to me. Words alone can not describe my feelings. George was not an ordinary man.  He did not walk in the same world you and I walk in. He did not see the same world you and I see. In his world, we are better than we are......... we cared more than we cared.  We acted towards each other with compassion. I wish we could have been really as good as he thought we were. I wish I could have been as good, kind and generous as he was.

George thought deeply about things.  He came to believe as I have, that we are all one. No matter the blood, no matter the skin, no matter the species, no matter the race, no matter........we are one. That we are gathered together in a common cause here in “earth school” and that we must be kind to one another and work for the common good. George understood that the very molecules of your body are the same molecules that make up this building, the  stars above........everything that is.  We are all connected.  We are one.

He was more than generous. If there were two pieces of pie to be eaten, he always offered me the big piece. If there was only one of something, he always offered it to me and said he did not want it. He always made me feel special, safe and nurtured.

George loved his grandchildren, Danielle and Michael, which we helped raise with their father, John’s help.  I remember one year when I had lost my job and there was not going to be very much money for our Christmas.  He took a job at one of the local stores, a job which was a huge step-down for him from what he was used to doing before he retired. But, that was the kind of man he was, he always put everyone’s welfare before his.

He was very proud of his son, John.  The fact that he became a RN and would be able to continue to do some noble work was a comfort to him.  He knew that John would be able to make a living after he was gone and he would not have to worry about him.  It gave him pleasure that John was doing work that not only insured a good income but, would also be something that would give comfort and ease to others in pain.  

After he had retired and I was still working, he usually would get dinner started or do it all before I came home so we could set down and have a nice family dinner.  We had had pork chops on the previous day for dinner so I said, “Are we having pork chops again tonight?”  (He had prepared pork chops.)  Well.... that was the wrong thing to say I found out.  He took the pan of pork chops and threw them off the back deck into the yard, burning his hand as he did so.   So...we were on our own that night for supper.  He never complained about his burned hand.  We ate sandwiches and everyone was very quiet at the table.  Needless to say I never made that mistake again.

He had a pet cat named Casper which he loved dearly.  Casper always slept in his cat bed by his chair.  Once when he didn’t know I was listening and he was very sick, I heard him say, “Casper, I don’t know who is going first, you or me.  Casper was 19 years old at the time and blind. (added later, well he went first and four months later Casper followed him.  I hope they find each other.  The last thing I said to Casper as he was dieing was just look for Daddy, look for Daddy.  If anyone can find each other, they will.)

I always seem to have need taking care of, and he seemed to need someone to take care of. It worked for 45 years. I only wish it was longer.  There was never enough time.....ever.

His hands were always warm, warm because he had rheumatoid arthritis which caused his hands to be inflamed and therefore warmer than they should  been.  Therefore, when he would give me a backrub, it was extra special.  But, oh I loved it all so.  I will miss those backrubs.  He was my man. … in all the ways a man can be to a woman.  

My pain can not be measured by any scale. The present is confusing, the future frightens me. The past haunts me. I seem to be living moment to moment, lost in that vast terrible in-between. I seem to have lost my way in grief and despair. I know that I must go on, that the future is all around us, waiting in moments to be born. None of us know the future, or where it will take us. I only know that for me, it will be paved in pain.

If he were here, I think he might say something like this to you.  All life is transitory....... a dream. We all come together in the same place..........at the end of time. If I don't see you again here.  I will see you, in a little while, in a place where no shadows fall..

I told him that when he gets to wherever it is we all go at the end of time, to look for me. I promised him that I also would look for him.  I know he will find me because he never let me down.

I was sitting on the hospital bed with him in my arms the day before he died and he looked into the eyes and said, "We were magnificent! Weren't we?  And, I said yes, we were magnificent.  We were magnificent..............

by Vergie Barber DeAntonio